His-Story

Looking back at the past, it's fair to say a lot has changed in my journey through life. Will you believe me if I say back in school years, I'm afraid of girls? Not just that, I'm so afraid of them that I can't even look at them. Not with them noticing. And yet I was a prefect in my first 3 years of secondary school. There's a reason for that and it goes way back to my childhood.

Throughout this 22 years, 4 months and 20 days of life I've lived, I realized that my way of thinking has been different. Ever since I was a kid, I was a selfish, loathed, arrogant, coward boy who always wants to have it my way. I used to curi-curi seluk poket of my father's pants and steal money from there.

Back then he just loves keeping money in his pocket for whatever reason. Makes it much more tempting to test my quick hand skills and see if anyone notices. But of course people notice. Looking back at it, I think even a young boy would notice if you take ALL the money from a pocket. Very childish but good memory nonetheless. What happened after? Imagined the worst case scenario when a 7 year old boy was found to steal money from his father. Add to that when the whole family finds out and a very angry mother. Nah, it wasn't what you imagined. Did I mention I was good at acting?

Now back to the present, the current, the today, the this moment. The way I think now is more mature. This weary body of mine didn't permit me to do a lot of things I loved doing back when I'm younger. Because of that I always have to think first before doing. I'm more realistic rather than ambitious. I try to aim for the sky, but I work my body to stay on the ground.

Good thing is, I'm no longer the selfish, coward boy I used to be. I'm proud, yes, there's some pride left in me, but not the same arrogance I had back then. I'm proud with what I've accomplished so far. I'm proud to have the family that I was born it. I'm proud to have met many good friends along the way. I'm proud to have been the student of plenty amazing, loveable teachers throughout my learning years. But I've learnt to be humble in these proud times. There's nothing greater than the Lord Himself and I'm just a slave still finding my purpose of life.

If given a ticket to the past, I want to go back to when I was 8. Back then, I went to Fraser's Hill after my family moved, following my father's transfer to a company there. I spent a whole 2 years on the hill and it was the most amazing 2 years I've had as a kid. The park, the cycling downhill, the go-karting, the remote control cars, the naughty rebellions and not to forget the wild boars. It was there I learnt about business. 

Yes, I had a few friends and we opened a small pen-selling business. The reception was so good that we expanded into rubber and finally foldable razor. Thanks to a careless consumer, we were found out by the teachers and were told to tutup kedai.

Alas, life goes on. And as proven by scientists who tried million times but failed, there's no way to go back to the past. Once you're born, you're set on a linear motion, a straight path with no turning back. I'm happy the way I turned out to be. I don't hold any grudges such that I have to pour acid on someone else to feel better. I don't tell lies just to make people like me and vote for me. I don't go to uni if I think it's not worth going. 

Wait, that doesn't sound right. I don't go to uni when I'm lazy. There, much better.

You must be wondering why the hell am I writing all these nonsense. I believe in history, as twisted as it may be, depending on who's telling. And I believe history is important and it determines who you are and what you will become. I'm writing this as all I've written is part of my his-story. Why I spelled it that way? Cause I made a theory that history is told by someone else, and that person tells the story to other people. That person tells 'his-story' to other people. Its his and not her cause English is sexist. Enough said.

There goes pieces and patches of my ordinary life. Not as entertaining as Maharaja Lawak, but a fond one for me.